A Few Things That Annoy Me

I'm finally starting to feel a little better (thank dog), and I'm at that stage now where I'm not sick enough to stay in bed and veg out to Rachael Ray, but not feeling quite well enough to hit the gym today. And that means that I am a little on the cranky side. Well, what better way to assuage the crankies than to rant about some stuff?

Actually, the topic popped into my head while I was perusing my Facebook wall. The more I think about it, the more I think I need to get away from Facebook--at least until the election is over. That one uber-political friend, the crazy ultra-right winger who probably has a stockpile of food and weapons in her basement, is just driving me beyond insane. I know it isn't directed at me, but at the same time, it kind of is because in her view, if you don't agree with her, you could not BE MORE WRONG and are worthy of only contempt.

So, in honor of the Facebook Friend Who Pisses You Off, I give you (in no particular order) a list of things that annoy me.

1. People who don't clean off the machines at the gym - You know these gross people. They've just spent forty minutes on the treadmill, you see the sweat dripping off them and yet, when they finish using the bench press, they don't clean it off. Seriously, WTF is wrong with these people? My gym is literally littered with spray bottles and rags -- all there for the express purpose of cleaning your grossness off the machines so no one else has to sit in your funk. Ew.

2. People who use the self-checkout lanes for their entire 2-weeks-worth-of-groceries shop - Now, I don't mean the people who use the scanner so that all they have to do is beep the End of Order bar and tally up (this is truly the only way to shop.) I mean the twit who has the entire cart filled to the point of overflowing, and is scanning. Each. Item. Individually. To me, those lanes are for small orders and the Scan-It orders. The fast orders.

3. The traffic light at the intersection of Dukes Parkway and Roycebrook Road - this signal is evil. I swear, every time I approach it, it changes to red (even when there is no cross traffic.) Then, just as I slow to a crawl, it turns green. It stays red long enough to slow me down and then BAM! Light changes. I swear it's mocking me. I don't know why, but that light's got it in for me.

4. People who comment on their own Facebook status - Not the ones who respond to the comments left by others. That's only polite. I mean the people who update their status, and are the only ones commenting on it. Do they realize they are, in essence, talking to themselves? And for the most part, it really isn't necessary to reiterate what you've just said. I get it. You hate Obama and you really want people to know it. Then you want them to know it again. And again. And again. Trust me, we get it. We just. Don't. Care. There isn't a single person on your friends' list who doesn't get it. Oh, and we all pretty much think you're nuts. It's very passive-aggressive, I realize, but I'm not about to start up a fight on Facebook over something as stupid as politics. I'll just gripe about it over here and on Twitter.

5. Spam - I don't know if it would annoy me quite as much if the stupid spammers at least got my gender right. WTF am I going to do with Viagra, Cialis, or any other penis-related drugs? I don't have a penis, you idiots. Spam me with offers for stuff like Jimmy Choos and I might (just maybe) bite. Trust me, I will never take you up on your ED meds offers. Oh, and I don't care how many lotteries I've won, I'm not sending you my bank account information.

And last, but not least

6. Blogger - Since when does Ctrl+I not italicize? I have to click on the little i up top, and then click on it 50 more times to unitalicize. WTF is that about? Grrr...

Okay. End of rant. As you were. :D

Things on My Mind

Whoa... it is possible? Two blog posts in as many days? Lately, if I'm lucky, I manage two blog posts in a month.

Then again, who am I to argue with inspiration?

I've started this post three times already, and each time, it just didn't seem right. Hopefully the fourth time is the charm. Mostly, what's been on my mind is BookEnds LLC's announcement this week that they are opening an Self-epublishing company. That set off a firestorm of discussion about whether this is a good thing or not, or if it's a conflict of interest to have an agent with a financial stake in a publisher.


Now, there's been a ton of discussion over at Absolute Write (you have to start on page 13) about BookEnds' self-epublishing company, Beyond the Page. And historical romance author Courtney Milan has done two blog posts about about agents acting as publishers (not specifically BookEnds/Beyond the Page, but agents acting as publishers in general. Just for clarification purposes) - the first one is here and the second half is here.

Frankly, I think it's a terrible idea. An agent is supposed to watch out for his/her clients' best interest. How am I supposed to trust that this is actually happening, if the agent stands to make (possibly) more money by steering me toward his/her publishing company instead of a commercial publisher?

Now, remember, I don't have an agent, so I really have no dog in this fight. I've done all right without one (but that's not to say I won't ever try for one, but for now, it's non-issue for me.) That said, I still don't agree with the practice. It seems unethical to me, even if there is nothing legally wrong with it. I don't know that I would be comfortable with it querying that agent (although to be fair, I have no evidence to suggest rejected manuscripts are being steered toward the self-publishing arm. If they were, then that would be wrong. Just. Wrong. Kind of like the Harlequin Horizons/DellArte Press fracas during the winter of 2010.) And if I was one of that agent's authors, I think I'd be equally uncomfortable with the situation as well.

And that leads me to my next rambling. Please, please, please, don't confuse self-publishing with epublishing. They are not the same thing. Not even close. Those authors with well-respected epublishers (such as Samhain) have had enough trouble being seen as "real" writers with "real" publishers. Attitudes regarding epublishing have come a long way, but there is still a bit of a divide amongst authors and associations where epubs are concerned. Self publishing is a completely different animal.

ETA - I just wanted to clarify that epublishing is a method of publishing (like print or POD). You can be commercially published through an epub.And you can be self-published through an epub. But being epubbed does not automatically make you self-published. Yikes, I hope that makes sense. :D

/lecture.

I promise my next post will be on the lighter side. It might even have an LOLcat or two. But even if it doesn't, it won't be a rant.

Promise. :D

Harlequin Horizons

I'm a little late to the game, as I only heard about this yesterday and wanted to do a little more research before I wrote anything, but yes - it's true. Harlequin has opened an imprint that is, basically, a vanity publisher.

Harlequin Horizons is a pay-to-play vanity arm of Harlequin Enterprises, Unlimited. That's right, for the low, low amount of $599, (packages start at $599 and go up to $1599) -  you can call yourself a Harlequin author. Forget honing your craft and polishing your work! Forget those endless months of waiting on a query/partial submission! Forget worrying about rejection. If you've got the money, you can be a Published Author.

Personally, if I was a Harlequin author, I'd be seething right about now. As a romance writer and lover of romance novels in general, I think it's a horrible idea on Harlequin's part because they are basically enforcing the negative stereotype that anyone can write a romance novel and have it published.

Harlequin has always been a premier name in the romance novel industry - even if you're one of those people who makes fun of romance novels (you know, dismisses them as 'bodice rippers' and 'porn for women'), chances are you know the Harlequin name. And now, in my opinion, that name has been sullied.

 True, there is a niche for self-publishing, which often works well for non-fiction that has a small, but existing platform (author Stacia Kane summed it up perfectly by using model train collecting as an analogy. There would be a market for a self-published book on model trains, but it would be a limited market.) But generally speaking, self-publishing is not the way to go for fiction.

But this isn't even self-publishing. It's vanity. And it is a slap in the face to those HQ authors who've worked so hard, paid their dues, waited months on end, only to have Harlequin basically say now, if you've got the money, you too can be a Published Author.

But we encourage you to indulge in your passion for writing and begin the next chapter of your life as a published author.

And that is taken from the Harlequin website. Their words.

Published

Author

I'm sorry, but buying a book package doesn't make a published author any more than my buying the entire run of ER on DVD makes me a doctor.

This cheapens the Harlequin brand. And it should be interesting to see how RWA responds to this, if they respond at all, since they are pretty clear in what they consider a publisher. And since Harlequin isn't marketing this line under another name, will Harlequin, by RWA's own definition, no longer be considered a non-vanity/non-subsidy publisher? I don't see how it could go any other way.

And what about the authors who buy these packages? Will they be eligible for RWA-PAN (Published Author Network)? Will their books be on the shelves next to the other Harlequin novels? And what happens when, if these books do find their way onto bookstore and grocery store shelves (my local Wegman's has two banks of shelves dedicated to Harlequin novels alone), and people do pick them up, only to find they are reading what is, essentially, slush? Books that haven't been edited (in the basic package, this is a separate charge. It doesn't become included in the price until you hit the $999 package), that possibly aren't even worthy of publication, what happens when those books end up in a reader's hand? It might be the last Harlequin title a reader ever picks up.

Of course, I don't know that any of the Harlequin Horizons books will ever end up on a shelf anywhere other that the author's own house. But what if? Because basically, what this line targets amounts to the slush pile. Not that the manuscripts are automatically unworthy of publication, there are bound to be gems hidden in that pile somewhere . But the purpose of most submission policies are designed to weed out the unpublishable dreck. And that's the truth. Just because someone writes a book, doesn't make it automatically worthy of publication.

I think it's a bad idea. A terrible idea, actually. And I think it's awful that Harlequin is doing this. Romance novels, and those who write them have enough negative stereotypes to deal with as it is, why make it worse? Why make the Anyone can write one of those books stereotype true? It's a slap in the face to romance writers, and especially those who write for Harlequin.

There's discussions going on at Smart Bitches and at Dear Author showing both sides of the argument.

Aggravation and Other Stuff

Did you ever have one of those days where it seems like everyone is out to get you?

Today is one of those days in my world.

Let me explain....

No, there is no time. Let me sum up:*

Over the summer, my husband had surgery. Went on disability. Came off disability in August and went back to work. Lo and behold, was temporarily laid off on September 11. He should be going back in about another two weeks (a work stoppage on the contractor's part) but until he does, we live on unemployment. (Yes. It does suck. You can't live on unemployment for very long.)

At least, that's how it's supposed to work.

But it doesn't if Disability still has you in their system. You can't collect Unemployment and Disability at the same time.

And getting Disability to release you is like banging your head against the wall. Only with banging your head against the wall, the agony does end. Not so much with Disability.

For the fourth time in two weeks, my husband's dealing with the lovely folks who work for the state of New Jersey. And I use the term work VERY loosely. All someone needs to do is take him out of the Disability computer system.

AND NO ONE SEEMS TO BE CAPABLE OF DOING THIS VERY SIMPLE THING!!!!! WTF?!?!?

**headdesk**

It's so simple and yet, for two weeks, we've been going round and round with the state. He's still down at the Unemployment office, most likely standing over the woman who's "helping" him, looking very much like Snoopy's vulture. Let's see if it does any good.

/rant

Okay. I'm good now.

And look - two posts, two days in a row.

I am on FIRE!

But now, it's time to get back to work on Dance with the Devil. And, of course, my morning chores (that's the "other stuff" part of the post.)

But look -

Two posts in two days.








*taken from teh ossum movie The Princess Bride

Professional

I had originally planned to write this post for yesterday, but then we had a little water heater emergency. And by emergency, I mean, our water heater died, so I spent yesterday buying a new water heater and having it installed. It ended up being an all day project and so, the blog post never quite got written.

It's just as well, as the topic was something I wanted to think over carefully, before I just sat down and dashed off a post. It's something that really bugs me, and I wanted a few days' space to let my irritation cool off a bit.

Over the weekend, I received my copy of the Romance Writers Report - which is Romance Writers of America's trade mag (basically I pay $100 a year for this magazine, as it's really all I get from RWA, but that's another post right there.) And in it, there one of the articles was basically about how, just because the Board might make a decision that you (singular) might not like, it doesn't mean that they aren't listening to you (the membership as a whole) but that they chose the good of the organization over the good of an individual.

To a certain point, I agree. Yes, an organization needs to act in the best interest of the membership as a whole and not kowtow to the needs of a small minority (which is kind of redundant, isn't it? If it was a big minority, it would be a majority, right? But I digress.)

But what got me, was that the article then veered off into the new (well, relatively new) PAN eligibility criteria. And that's when smoke sort of began puffing out of my ears.

A quick recap - prior to July, 2007, RWA's PAN eligibility criteria was based on what publisher an author signed with. They had a list of "RWA-Approved Publishers." If you signed a contract with one of those publishers, you were eligible for PAN.

Fast forward to July, 2007, when quite a few epublishers made the list (Loose-Id, Ellora's Cave, Triskelion, and my publisher - Samhain Publishing to name a few), the rules were then changed. No longer would it be based on publisher, but on money earned by the individual writers.

Now, I'll grant you, the Triskelion collapse and ensuing mess helped perpetuate the need for change, but I am still convinced that RWA does not see its epublished authors as being equals to their print published authors. And since July, 2007, they have done almost nothing to show the opposite is true.

Here is their mission statement:

Romance Writers of America is dedicated to advancing the professional interests of career-focused romance writers through networking and advocacy.

That sounds wonderful, and they should be dedicated to this.

But....

It seems to me that they have redefined what the words "professional" and "career-focused" mean.

Before 2007, if you signed with one of the publishers on the List - you were apparently profession and career-focused. After 2007, though, that was not enough. Now, in order for RWA (a group dedicated to advancing the careers of romance writers, mind you) to consider you a "professional" and "career-focused", you must earn a minimum of $1,000 through an advance on the sale of one book, or a combination of advance/royalties on a single title.

Now, it's a standard that epublishers generally don't offer advances - Samhain is one of the exceptions to the rule. But on the other hand, the royalties earned are higher than that of print publishers - 30-40% for epubs vs 8% for print. And epublished books can and do earn over a thousand dollars in royalties.

I firmly believe that there should be standards and they should be high - especially with the glut of epublishers springing up all over the place. Any fool can throw up a website and call themselves an epress. So there do need to be guidelines and standards and I will never suggest otherwise.

However...

Certain epublishers had already reached the RWA's standards. And then RWA changed them. And to rationalize their change, they basically came out and said that anyone who does not meet the PAN criteria is not seriously persuing a career in writing romance fiction.

What?

Well, okay, I can see their point - and the RWA cheerleaders I've come across who basically tell me that RWA just lurves their epublished authors as much as they lurve their print publishers and that I'm just not seeing that because... well... because....

And that's it. They can't tell me why I'm wrong, just that I am wrong.

If I am wrong, then why the mess with the RITA awards this year?

A quick recap - used to be, if you were published through an RWA-approved publisher, you were eligible for the RITA (which is the romance fiction industry's Oscar Award.) If you were published by a publisher NOT on their list, or uncontracted, you could enter the Golden Heart (the unpublished romance writer's Oscar, if you will.)

Not this year.

Oh, RWA never made a formal announcement (at least, I don't think they did - I never saw it and no one else could ever show me where the announcement was made, either) regarding the changes in their RITA rules. But the change was there. In two words -

mass-produced

In order to be eligible for the RITA, an author's book had to be

1) published by a Non-Vanity/Non-Subsidy publisher (and yes, RWA does have a list.)
2) Be in print format
3) be mass-produced

And there it was - no definition was offered for what constituted "mass-produced" and even today, as far as I know, there is no definition. But, it meant that books published by companies such as Samhain, were no longer RITA-eligible because, even though there was no definition of mass-produced, RWA decided that Samhain (among other publishers) did not meet the definition (you know, the one that didn't - and still doesn't - exist.)

And the kicker - because Samhain is on their list of Non-Vanity/Non-Subsidy publishers, a Samhain author (among other publishers) was not eligible for the Golden Heart either. Want to know why?

Because that author is published.

**headsmack**

So, let's get back to the RWR article - which basically says that if an author does not earn at least $1000 in advance and/or royalties (on a single title, mind you), she (or he) is obviously not a professional writer. Or pursuing a career.

Now, on one hand, I can understand this. Yes, writers should make money. But to basically say that unless you make that grand on a single title, you are no more than a hobbyist is insulting.

Look at this way -

Author A sells a manuscript to Avon. She gets an advance of $5,000 and a print run of 10,000 books. She is eligible for PAN and the RITA. And never sells another book - whether by choice or not.

Author B writes in a genre that isn't quite so mainstream (think erotic romance 15 years ago), NY houses aren't brave enough to take the chance, so she sells to Samhain. And goes on to release two books a year, but no single title necessarily reaches the $1000 mark. But she's producing book after book after book. Advancing her career if you will.

Which is the professional and which isn't? Which author is pursuing a career in writing romance fiction?

Ahh... and there's the rub. RWA never addresses that. And I frankly find it insulting to those who have chosen epublishing that their own advocacy group does not consider them professional.

I'm tired of the whole mess, to be honest. It's ridiculous and so far, even RWA can't figure out what their words mean, which doesn't fill me with a whole lot of confidence, to be honest. When a group of writers can't define their own words, it kind of makes me wonder if I really want them advocating for me.

And as far as I know, they still haven't decided what they mean by "mass-produced." It would be funny, really, if it weren't so pathetic.

TGIF!

And then some.

I'm very glad it's Friday - especially this week. Why is it that short weeks always seem so long? Well, this was definitely one of those long-short weeks. Plus, the sick is still running amok (don't you just love that word???) through my house. Oh, yeah, and Adventures with Web Guy? Still on the air. I swear I'm going to wish the worst kind of mojo on this guy. Even I can't believe this nonsense. Ugh. I don't even want to talk about it because it just ticks me off.

Ahem.

So, we've all been sick. Sick. SICK. SICK!!! And quite frankly, I'm sick of it. I'm finally starting to feel like myself again, and now the Boy is sick. Again. And no one can convince me that it's not related to his stupid flu vaccination, because that's when this whole thing started. The last time he had a flu vaccination, he got sick. This time, he got sick. And yet his pediatrician thinks I'll actually believe it's just - gasp! - a coincidence. Yeah. Right. Uh-huh. And I'll bet he has some swamp land in Florida he could sell me real cheap, as well.

I know, I sound so grumpy, don't I? But I'm not - not really. Spring is only 28 days away (not that I'm counting and when did spring start on March 20th? I always thought it was the 21st, but my calendar says the 20th. Weird.) And I have great hopes that the weather WILL get warm. The sick WILL leave my house. And I WILL finally be done for good with Web Guy (putz. There's just no other word that's quite as fitting for him, to be honest. He's. A. Putz.)

So now that I'm feeling better, it's back to work. And buh-lieve me, there is plenty that needs to be done.

If You Can't Say Something Nice...

Come sit by me.

**grins**

Seriously though, over the weekend, there was a huge kerfuffle (I do like that word!) over at Dear Author involving Ellora's Cave and their lawsuit against Borders bookstore chain. And reading over the comments thread - yow, the fur sure was flying for a while.

Anyway, this kerfuffle involved quite a few current and former EC authors, and their experiences (good and bad) with that publisher. Some signed their name to their comments, but some remained anonymous, but for very good reason. Now, normally I take anonymous comments with a grain of salt, but this is one case where I understand why anonymity is sought. Whether it is true or not, there was fear of retribution for some of the current authors, and so I don't fault them at all for not wanting to sign their names.

The comments grew heated and DA's blog admin basically let the debate go on and for that, I say good for them. It was ugly at times, but I think it offered up a chance for those of us who have never really dealt with this publisher, to see both their good and their bad. Some of the comments were signed, many were variations of anonymous - but the entire thread was an interesting read.

So this morning, on one of the blogs I read fairly regularly, was a steaming diatribe against the classlessness and disgrace of Dear Author allowing the comment thread to run the way it did.

Huh?

This was a writer's blog condemning the debate. A writer suggesting that Dear Author should have not let the debate go on the way it did. A writer suggesting that those unhappy authors should have just sat down and shut up, basically.

Again, huh???

Now, I suppose it is only fair to say that the author condemning the blog is an EC author, and I am not about to name her, since she also believes that anyone blogging about the Dear Author post and comment thread is doing so in order to draw more hits to his or her blog. I think that's just a lousy thing to say, and extremely self-righteous as well. I suppose only she is allowed an opinion on the matter and not only that, but hers is basically the right opinion to have.

Um. No.

I, on the other hand, did not have a problem with these other authors offering up their experiences - both good and bad - in public, There's nothing wrong with that. In fact, were I thinking of submitting to this publisher, it's something I would find very interesting and not at all different from what I might ask a writer friend. Now, I don't write for this publisher, -my one sub to them went unanswered, and follow ups to see if they even received it went ignored as well - which seemed a little unprofessional to me but in no way had colored my opinion of them. A sub I made to a big NY house went ignored as well once. It happens, I guess. And after reading all of those comments, I don't know that I would ever sub to them. I'm not saying I wouldn't, just that I don't know if I would. But that's what a prospective author should see - the good and the bad.

Yes, there were a few comments that were more personal attacks, and those should have been reined in a little - but overall, I found the author experiences could be an invaluable bit of research, as I said. In no way should they have kept quiet. It was my impression by the condemner that saying nice stuff is okay. But saying not-so-nice stuff? Verboten.

I don't agree with this. I don't think authors should diss their publishers for the sake of causing controversy or to air out their grievances that could (and should) be handled by direct dealings with their publisher (see the old posts on Anne Stuart/Jenny Crusie/Miss Snark). But, if it's something being done in an informative way - that's different and that poster has as much right to say, "This is what happened to me, despite my doing X,Y,Z" as the blogger taking these authors to task for saying it.

It seems to me that it's a case of "I support freedom of speech as long as I like what you have to say," and it doesn't work that way. Nor should it. Imagine if no one ever gave the negatives... I shudder to think of what would happen.

Now, of course the blogger has every right to air her disgust with what she saw - but those who commented in that thread had every right to comment as well, even if they later regret what they may or may not have said. I don't doubt that those who used their names gave a long, hard thought to what they were writing. And for that, I give them props. Mega-props, actually. Some of the experiences had me doing a WTF???

Now, I have no dog in this fight at all, except it drives me nuts when any person or group basically agrees that we all have the right to say what we think, but that those of us who dissent should basically keep that to ourselves. Um, again, no. No, dissenters shouldn't. You might not like it, but that's too bad. You don't get to decide what should or shouldn't be said, any more than I do. And if you don't like it? Too bad.

ETA - After a bit of thought, I decided to go back and identify Dear Author and Ellora's Cave.

DISCLAIMER - As I said, I do not write for EC, and therefore all of my knowledge has come from those who either do or did write for them at one point, and what their experiences were.

Still No Response

I sent an email to my computer/web guy on Monday morning to alert him to the fact that my website has been suspended. I asked how I go about securing my domain name until I am ready to use it. And I've yet to receive a response.

Tell me, am I being unreasonable?

Is it too much to ask that he answer one question? One little, teensy, very-politely worded question?

Apparently so.

Hmm... I'm also in the process of trying to get rights to two of my books reverted back. I've been emailing the publisher since, oh... let's see... October... about getting them back. I've been told the rights will revert. I have asked for something in writing saying that, as of such-and-such a date, the rights reverted back to me. And what have I received so far?

Nothing.

I've sent requests to various website designers to get quotes. I contacted four. I've heard back from one, asking me to be a little more specific about my needs. No problem. I sent her back what I was looking for and we'll see what she comes back with. One quoted me a price so high I almost fainted.

The other two?

Nothing.

What IS it with these so-called "professional" people who can't be bothered with responding to their email? Why is it so much to ask that they just reply?

If they are slowing up for the holidays, I can understand that - but a simple autoresponse saying such a thing would be nice. At least let me know someone will eventually be in touch with me.

The publisher I can deal with - I have all the time in the world to nag them to death. But this computer guy's really teeing me off. One. Simple. Question. And like I said, my domain name and my website mean jack squat to him, but they mean something to me. Not to mention, it's just rude to not reply.

Grrrr....

So far, I'm learning html code. I'm learning CSS. It's all pretty cool. We'll have to see if I actually have the skills to create my own website. If not, I might have to see about getting a template from someone else and working with that. But that will lead to a million more questions. That is, a million more than I already have. But at least I know I will always reply to myself.

And really, I don't have the time or the patience to chase after these people. I'm sick of having to do that. Ugh, now I'm just bumming myself out.

Oooh, new email. Do I dare hope it's a --gasp-- reply???

Website Woes, Lazy Susans, and Red Food Coloring (yes, it's THAT kind of post!)

So, as my website woes continue, I am becoming a computer geek. I went out and bought myself an HTML for Dummies book and, little by little, I am learning how to write lines of code to produce one line on a web page. It's been fun, a little frustrating, but I'm muddling through. Of course, I wouldn't have to be doing this is my computer/web guy didn't suck so much. I sent him an email two days ago, basically asking him how I re-register my domain name so I don't lose it. Two days ago. A simple question and yet he hasn't bothered to reply. Now, I know my little website isn't important to him, he has other clients (though if he treats them all this way, I have to wonder how that's even possible.) But, it IS important to me and it's pissing me off that I have yet another supposed professional that I have to hunt down.

I will learn how to do this and someday, I will look back and laugh.

Yeah right.

And so we segue into the lazy Susans.

My kitchen has two. And the Boy likes to climb. He's discovered that he can climb the lazy Susans.

Great.

I've caught him "cleaning" the counters with dishwashing detergent. "Washing" his hands with hand lotion. He sprayed his hair with Pam (which is fun to wash out, let me tell you). There's pepper all over the place. And I think he's now addicted to vanilla extract.*

But wait, the fun only gets better.

The Girl and I made Christmas cookies over the weekend.

Candy cane cookies.

Well, sort-of Candy cane cookies. They're more like candy-cane-on-steroids-cookies. I'll post pictures tomorrow.

Anyway, candy canes are red and white, right? So, guess what makes them red? If you said red food coloring, you are right! If you said anything else - WTF are you cooking with???

So, the Boy likes to climb. He likes to climb the Lazy Susans. And he likes the cabinets.

And it turns out, he is utterly fascinated by the red food coloring.

**sigh**

I scrubbed red off me. Off him. Off the counter. Off the cabinets.

I just hope I got it all.

Yes, yesterday was tons of fun. The red food coloring makes the pain in the ass, can't be bothered to reply computer guy seem like a stroll through the park.

And today? Back to the code. And I'll be getting the Boy a new pair of shoes. Oh, and it snowed last night, so the neighborhood looks pretty. And when is all said and done?

I will have a website. Oh yes. I will.



*I'm only kidding about the vanilla thing. Really. =)

A (Hopefully) Humorous Rant

Whoa... posts two days in a row??? When did the planets align and does this mean the End of Days is here?

Well, the end of days thing depends on who you talk to and, as far as I know, the planets have not aligned. So all should be well.

No, this post came into being while I was at the gym yesterday. It's a women-only gym, which is why I chose it. I used to belong to Bally's (when it was Jack LaLanne and let me tell you, they closed my gym down and it took me literally YEARS to get them to cancel my membership - even though the nearest Jack LaLanne's was almost an hour from my house. By the time I succeeded, they owed me two thousand dollars in refunded dues. It was a nice victory, once I finally got it.) and I hated it because the guys there seemed to think that the only reason any women came there was to get hit on. They didn't quite seem to grasp that some of us actually wanted to **gasp** work out.

So, I joined this women's only gym and I love it. It's small and quiet, but with great machines and a good staff and no MuscleBob BuffPants doing his, 'How you doin'?' while I'm sweating my face off on the StairMaster.

Now, I like going to the gym because it's two hours to myself. I plug into my iPod and I'm in the zone and no one bothers me. That's how I like it.

But there was something I noticed today and it bugged me. And the more I thought about it, the more it bugged me even further.

So, I've been thinking about it and here it is, the 10 Commandments of Common Gym Courtesy (ranked in no particular order aside from the order in which I came up with them)

10. Thou shalt not gossip with friends by shouting over the music/instructor/tv -Really, if you need to catch up, go somewhere quiet - like the locker room. Don't make me have to blast my iPod to drown out the sound of your voice and really, no one else wants to know about your stomach flu, or your hemorrhoids or how bad your cramps are. Got that? No. One. Cares. And frankly, it's making some of us feel sick.

9. Thou shalt not use thy cell phone in the workout area - see Commandment No. 1 for the reasons. They're pretty much the same. Really - almost nothing is so important that it can't wait an hour, and if it is that important - what the hell are you doing in the gym anyway??

8. Thou shalt not wear spandex gym clothes if thou does not have the body for them - Mean, maybe, but true. Repeat after me - Just because it comes in my size, doesn't mean I should wear it. Yes, I applaud women (it's a women only gym, remember) who decide to try to exercise more, it takes a lot of guts to begin working out and I'm pretty impressed by your courage and determination. And lord knows, I need to lose a few pounds (which is exactly why I'm there, sweating my face off on the elliptical trainer 3-4 times a week.) That said, please, please, please save the spandex for when you reach your goal weight (as I'm confident you will do!)

7. Conversely, thou shalt not wear spandex if you are in better shape than me - I was feeling pretty good about myself when I left the house this morning. Then I saw Barbie at the gym. Damn. Where are the Oreos??

6. Thou shalt not leave the weight plates on the machines - You know, I have two kids. I spend a lot of time picking up after them. I do not want to pick up after you, gym rat whose name I don't even know. If you use a machine, take the freakin' weights off when you're finished. It's not that difficult and it's pretty damn aggravating when I have to take your weights off in order to put my weights on.

5. Keep thy distance in any aerobics class - I'm not the most coordinated person in the room, so I try to take classes where I don't run the risk of pissing someone off by smacking into them, or throwing off the class (or talking into my cell phone - there are people who do this and you know who you are.) Just be careful. And courteous.

4. Keep thy chit-chat to a minimum during any class - It's hard enough to hear the instructor (damn her in her spandex!) without struggling to hear her over your lame-ass gossip. And again, the TMI?? Keep it to yourself or run the risk of a beat-down with a step-class step.

3. Thou shalt not hog ALL the weights at once - If your routine includes 10lb, 15lb, 20lb, and 25lb weights - there is no need to hoard them all around your bench. Not only does it clutter the area and make it dangerous to walk around, but if you take weights you aren't going to use for the next 20-30 minutes, it's just kind of greedy. I promise you, I will be done with them by the time you need them.

2. Thou shalt not cross between the body in motion and the mirror - Sometimes it's vanity (wow, are these my arms?) but mostly, if you see someone on a bench, doing curls and watching in the mirror, it's that person making sure they're using correct form so they don't get hurt. You'd be amazed how easy it is to hurt a shoulder or your back because you twisted or bent just a little bit weirdly. Not to mention, it can be distracting, which can also be dangerous.

1. Thou shalt wipe down any and all benches thou has used in thy routine - Honestly, do you know how disgusting it is to leave behind a sweaty piece of equipment? The gym is littered (and I mean, literally littered with spray bottles of cleaner and rags - you can't walk 2 feet without falling over one.) It takes about 10 seconds to spray and wipe down a bench or machine. Would you want to sit or lay back in someone else's sweat? EWWWWW!! So take the time and wipe the machine and stop being so lazy. This is the most important of the gym courtesies and you'd be amazed at how many people can't be bothered. Ick.

There you have it, the 10 Commandments of Gym Courtesy.

That is all. You may return to your regularly scheduled life.

The Grump

This sums up how I feel this morning almost perfectly. It's been raining since late Tuesday night, my computer's giving me an ulcer, I've got projects coming out of my ears and I'm only about halfway finished with my Christmas shopping. Yep - the effin' bluebird of happiness - I'd like to squoosh him!

Ahem

Okay, now the grumpfest is (almost) over. I think. I don't like being grumpy (though I must admit, I do it very well) but sometimes there is just no avoiding the grump.

This would be a good time for my latest bitchfest about RWA - although it's not really a bitchfest. It's more of a WTF??? fest because their latest has me thisclose to a major headdesk.

A quick recap - RWA's Rita award is given out to the best published romance (or novels with romantic elementsm I suppose) novels in a myriad of categories. It's kind of a big deal in the romance publishing industry, and let's face it, who doesn't like winning awards?

Okay, so we all know by now that in the summer of 2007, RWA did away with its "Approved Publisher" list. Now, this was a big deal because if your publisher was on that list, RWA considered you published and you were eligible for PAN (their Published Authors Network). Well, then they decided that this list had to go. Their reasons depend on who you ask - but some authors with epubs or small presses saw it as a slap in the face and (another) attempt on RWA's behalf of making sure epubbed authors were not seen as equally published with their NYprint pubbed authors. RWA did some backpedaling, and came up with their Non-Vanity/Non-Subsidy Publisher (hereafter shortened to NV/NS) list. Which means that epubbed authors are considered published, if their epub or small press pub was on this list.

So, what's the problem? you might ask. Well, I'm getting to that.

The Rita is for published authors only. Fair enough. RWA has the Golden Heart contest for unpublished writers. Okay. If your publisher was on that NV/NS list, you were eligible to enter the Rita.

Until now.

See, this year, RWA changed their Rita rules. Now, the rules stipulate that the only books eligible are those put out by NV/NS publishers and are "mass-produced."

Um... okay. And what number constitutes "mass-produced"? you might ask.

AHA! is what I would say in return.

Quite a few (understandably) miffed epublished authors put this question to RWA. Why this change? If a reason was given, I missed it. But okay, it happens. I miss RWAalerts from time to time - I hate my laptop and usually the feeling's mutual so it eats emails on me. And not only was this change made in a seemingly arbitrary way, it was also hidden in the "fine-print" (so to speak) - which is just sneaky, if you ask me. But that's another post for another day.

So, one of my publishers broached RWA about a definition of "mass-produced." It's an understandable question - the rumors went from a print run of 500 to one of 5,000. Now, for a NY print house, 5k is a small print run, but for a small press or epub, it's a huge run. And there were grumblings that the number was raised to 5k in order to, once again, mess with the epubbed/small press authors.

And to make matters worse, any of us under contract with an NV/NS house (Rita-eligible or not) were NOT eligible for the Golden Heart. Hmm... too published for the GH but perhaps not quite published enough for the Rita. Yeah. Makes perfect sense...

So, we waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

Then lo and behold! RWA had an answer on the "what defines mass-produced" question.

Ready for this?

THEY DON'T KNOW!!!!!

I'm not kidding. Their response was that they were going to form a task force to discuss the language and what it means.

This group of writers (remember, RWA is a writers' organization, whose mission statement is to help writers aspiring to a career in romance writing) doesn't know what their own language means!

I don't know if that's hysterically funny or sadly pathetic that they wrote this rule without even giving thought to what the hell they mean by it. And that's were the headdesk comes into play. These writers don't know the meaning of their own words and have to form a freakin' task force to figure it out. Yep - my nearly $100 in yearly dues at work. Ay yi yi. Is it any wonder some of us get so disgusted with this organization?

I broached this latest gem on AW, and it quickly became a NY Print Pub vs EPress/Small Pub argument. E-and-small press pubs should have their own contest. Um, no. No, they shouldn't. This separate-but-not-entirely-equal bs has to stop. RWA needs to accept that epubs aren't going away and some of them are of equal reputation as NY houses. They need to stop treating e-and-small-press published authors like bastard children who are playing at being writers.

My feeling is that RWA needs to go back to their Approved Publisher list. Tweak it if you need to (because there should absolutely be standards and those standards should be set high). I still feel they changed those standards because they never really believed epublishing would take off the way it has and no one is going to change my mind on that. But in doing so, they've gotten themselves so tied up, they don't know which end will loosen the rope or which end will tighten it.

Hey, what do you know?The grump is now gone... **takes a deep breath**

Sometimes all you need is a good venting...

Ah... Life...

Did you ever hurt yourself and not know how you did it?

I have.

Just recently, actually.

But first, a little background info. My knees are in terrible shape and have been since I was 14. In gym class (playing flag football, of all stupid things) I stepped in a hole and tweaked my right knee. I ended up tearing cartilage and had surgery on it when I was 15.

Fast forward - now I have two creaky knees and the left one is getting creakier by the moment. This past Friday night, I'm sitting on the sofa, working on my laptop, when my left knee starts killing me. I mean, the pain is excruciating - a sudden, sharp burn stretching from the top of my shin to the bottom of my thigh. Now, this normally happens when I sit with my legs bent for too long (one of the main reasons why I no longer go to the movies. I can't stand the pain after about 15-20 minutes). And if I straighten my leg, pain eventually fades away.

Well not this time. I've been gimping around since Friday night. My knee is puffy and sore to the touch as well. I tried an Ace bandage on Saturday. Nope. I've been using IcyHot wraps every night. Nope. I've been taking Tylenol PMs like crazy just to sleep. According to my husband, I'm actually groaning with pain in my sleep (when I sleep, anyway. I haven't slept a full night since Thursday.) It's that bad.

Enough is enough. Time to call the doctor. I'm pretty stoic when it comes to pain (I was in labor with my daughter for about 8 hours before my husband even knew. And after we got to the hospital, even the nurses were amazed at how calm and coolheaded I was - what good would it do to scream and yell? Certainly wouldn't make it hurt less, right???) but I've had enough. I'm tired of it. It's time to find out just what's wrong.

Keep your fingers crossed that it's relatively minor.

But major enough for a good painkiller =)

First Day of School

It really is the most wonderful time of the year.

Now, I'll admit, when the Girl began preschool, I wondered how the time could go by so fast. When she started kindergarten, I thought the same thing. Last year, when she started first grade, and would be gone all day, I thought I'd hate it.

But I didn't, and I still don't. In fact, I kind of like it. Isn't that terrible?

It's nice, getting my days kind of to myself again. Sure, I have to get up early to get showered and dressed and all, and there is still the Boy to deal with as well - but it's nice all the same.

Of course, this year, there had to be a hitch, and this one came compliments of the school system's transportation department.

See, they send out bus passes in August. And we didn't get one this year. It didn't really dawn on me until yesterday (seeing as how the Girl only found out who her teacher was last Thursday, I can't say I'm surprised - they love to procrastinate) so I called the transportation department.

Well, they took the Girl's name and our phone number, said they'd look it up, and call me back. This was at 3PM.

By 4:45, when I didn't hear back, I called again. Got someone new. Someone new proceeded to tell me that yes, a bus pass was sent out.

To our old address.

Insert headsmack here.

Now, last year at this time, I already made arrangements with this same transportation dept. that as of October 22, 2007, my daughter would be taking the bus from the new address. They updated their system.

Apparently, someone screwed up.

Last year, I must've filled out the same updated information forms half a dozen times. I'm not exaggerating. For the last set, my husband actually went to the school office and filled them out in front of someone because he was so tired of giving them the same information over and over. Now all school correspondence reaches us and it became painfully obvious that the left hand and the right hand don't communicate all that well with each other.

So this secretary basically tells me the system's updated (HA!) but that it won't go into effect until Monday. Well, that's not good enough, I tell her. Now I have to make arrangements to get the Girl back and forth to school for two days. Arrangements that I should not have to make because they screwed up. Hey, they don't know I'm home all day, right? And that's beside the point any way.

Well, I'm sorry, she tells me. There's nothing I can do.

(Now, mind you, I'm sick. I feel better today, but I felt like hell yesterday. Not a good day to piss me off and that's what this secretary was doing. I understand it wasn't her fault, but still...)

Then get me someone who can help me because this is totally unacceptable.

So she puts me on hold forever. I'm convinced she figured I'd just hang up. She doesn't know me at all. I'm like a pit bull with a steak bone and I ain't hangin' up for nuttin'.

Long story short, I won and put my daughter on the bus this morning. Sometimes, being sick is just what you need to get things done the right way. She'll have her bus pass on Monday (yeah, right) but at least she could get on the stupid bus today. We'll see what happens tomorrow.

A Few of My (Not) So Favorite Things

This is always a fun topic, isn't it? Writer pet peeves, or just pet peeves in general. I've got 'em. Who doesn't, when you think about it?

So, since I'm going to the shore tomorrow to visit my mother in law, I'm posting this now. It's almost 2AM and I'm sleepy, so I can't guarantee that it'll make a whole lot of sense. If not, I'll fix it when I get home.

And so -

A list of some of my (not) so favorite things =)

1.Stupid commercials - I am one of those people who likes commercials. I figure, it takes a lot of talent to create something that has to catch your attention, and suck you in, and has seconds to do it. But, that applies to good commercials - you know the ones - The Budweiser Frogs. The Wendy's Where's the Beef? old ladies. They are good. Timeless. I like them. But the stupid ones? I'd rather poke myself in the eye with a fork than sit through them. Right now, my number one stupidest-pass-me-a-fork-NOW commercial is that one for Secret with the twit walking through a city raising her arms as much as she can. Grrr... I want to see her get hit by the taxi. Want to walk? Here, let me get you started!

2. Tailgaters - I know I've blogged about these a-holes. The ones who think that, if they can get thisclose to me, I'll suddenly speed so they can go faster. Now, I've got a bit of a lead foot, so it's rare that I'm under the speed limit. If I'm already 10 miles over the posted limit, you're crazy if you think I'm going faster still. Ten mph is not enough for most cops to write a ticket. Over that however... well... sorry, buddy... I'm not getting a ticket for someone I like, never mind a jerk whose grill is almost fused to my bumper. You're lucky I don't slam on my brakes. It's tempting. I could use the money.

3. Non-writers who say, "Well, I've got a great idea for a book. I'll tell you what it is, you can write the book, and we'll split the royalties!" Um. No. No. I don't see this happening. See, coming up with the idea is kind of the easy part. And even if I was going to consider this (which I'm not, so don't ask), there's no guarantee that the book will be sold. You have an idea? Great. You write the book. Enjoy.

4. Microsoft programs - need I say more?

5. Microsoft Vista - yes, it's a Microsoft product, but it is annoying enough to warrant its own listing. My Vista does funky stuff - windows minimize and maximize at the oddest times (I'll click on a link for a website, and the entire window shrinks. It's really quite irritating, actually.) I also hate that it checks and double-checks that it's okay for it to do the things I tell it to do. I'm the administrator. Trust me, Vista, it's okay. Don't bring up ten more "confirm operation" boxes. Just. Do. It.

6. That my Feedburner stats are off by a day and I don't know why. Heck, I don't even know if this is good or bad.

7. That my playing around with my blog screws up my stats. I think I'm getting popular - then I realize that I'm the reason why I'm popular, because I decided to change stuff on my blog. Or worse, try to improve it, only to make it all a huge mess, and spend two hours getting back the way it was (this just happened to me today, btw)

8. Lists of stuff that I don't like - They make me grouchy. And this was supposed to be a lighthearted grouchy kind of list. I hope it came off that way. I'm really not that grumpy. For the most part.

Now it's your turn - what are some of your pet peeves? And I better not show up anywhere on that list =)

Some days...

Are better than others.

And some days just really totally suck.

I think today is shaping up into a totally sucking day. I couldn't think of anything to blog about, and since I did something off the blog topic list yesterday, I didn't want to do another today.

It's also a sort-of not-quite-overcast-but-not-quite-sunny day. Hot. Humid. Blech.

One of the gerbils bit my daughter's thumb, so she was bleeding all over the place and crying like Tiger'd taken off the tip of her finger. Now, I know gerbils have sharp teeth, and it does hurt when they bite, but her reaction was a bit drama-queenish...

I've had to send my son to his room twice. Do you know how stupid you feel, sending a 3 year old to his room? And what's worse, he goes in, shuts the door, and comes right back out. Well, he went to his room. Mommy didn't say anything about him staying there, though, right?

I have to dust and I hate dusting. Yesterday, I was like a madwoman, vacuuming everything that didn't get out of my way fast enough - I did carpets, baseboards, ceiling, molding - all of it. What a workout. But I just don't feel like dusting. My house has wood trim and moldings, six-panel doors, and then there's the furniture. That's a lot of wood. And a lot of dusting. Yuck.

The pool needs to be vacuumed as well - and I know how to vacuum it, but I don't know exactly how to hook up said vacuum. My husband tried to explain it when he got home last night, but I'm one of those dolts who needs to be walked through it - he explains while I actually set up the vacuum - otherwise I can't wrap my mind around what it is he's trying to explain. That's what happens when you have a left-brain thinker (him) trying to explain something to a right-brain thinker (that's me). So there's some gack in the pool and it's bugging the hell out of me, but I can't do anything with it until he gets home. Ugh.

So, there's plenty for me to do around here, but it's housework, which automatically puts it into the suck category. I'm not big on cleaning, though I do hate messes. And my newest story is just burning a hole in my brain to get written - which doesn't suck. So, we'll have lunch, I'll put the Boy down for a nap, let the Girl go in the pool (the gack won't hurt her and it bothers her a lot less than it does me), and I'll bring my laptop into the Florida room and sit and write for two hours.

And I managed to find something to blog about after all. Hmm... maybe today won't be such a sucky day after all?

The Neverending Rewrite

Ugh. This was supposed to be easy - rewrite one scene. One scene. How hard could it be?

Pfft. Unfortunately, rewriting that one scene means I can't use the following scene and I need the following scene. It's not just that I like it or I hate to cut it, but I actually need it.

See, here's the thing - in the original draft, the first love scene between Hugh and Miranda happens in an abandoned gamekeeper cabin. When I reread it, I didn't think it was all that romantic and not entirely realistic. An abandoned cabin in a snowstorm. Meh.

So, I rewrote it, so now it happens in a conservatory - a little warmer, a little more comfy, a little more believable. It's supposed to be a passionate and "I have to have you NOW!" scene and that worked okay, I thought.

But....

(don't you just hate when there's a but?)

Now, the following scene doesn't work and I'm not sure how to get it to work, since Hugh and Miranda's emotions have changed from the original draft.

Again, in the original draft, they are lying by this meager little fire and Hugh opens up to Miranda about the horrors in his past. It shows his vulnerability and how he trusts her, since it's something he hasn't really shared with anyone.

Well, in the new draft, I can't work this in. Partly because it went from the floor of a cabin, to a wrought iron bench in a conservatory. There's nowhere for them to laze about, enjoy the afterglow and do some soul-baring.

Argh.

I need this scene to move the story forward. Otherwise, it's just kind of a frivolous, surrender to the moment love scene that really isn't needed.

So, I'm going to put the call out - which scene do you think would work better? Is the cabin in the woods thing believable? Corny? Just plain sucky?

Meanwhile, I'm going to bang my head against the wall until I figure out a way to work the soul-baring into the new scene...

Deadlines and Rewrites

Ugh.

I haven't been around much because I am up to my eyes in a book I've been trying to get off my desk for the last two weeks. Why is it that no matter how simple something seems, it ends up taking three times as long as you originally thought it would.

That's the case here. I've been doing the last polishes of this %#^! book and it seems like it is taking me forever to finish. Part of it is translating my own handwriting (never good when you can't read your own notes, let me tell you), and then getting the changes into the computer, then printing out each chapter, then rereading it... ugh.. I thought I'd be done by Friday. Now, if I'm lucky, it'll go out early to mid-next week. Thank God this is a self-imposed deadline, or I'd really be tearing my hair out.

So, I won't be around much until this is all done and off my desk. Then I'll be back and chewing my (virtual) nails as I await my editor's response...

Oh, and in case I don't get around to blogging tomorrow - Happy Fourth of July!

Bodice-Ripper & Other Romance Stereotypes

A few days ago, MSNBC ran a very scientific poll about whether or not people read romance novels. And by scientific, I mean, they had three options: (these are not taken verbatim, but are my interpretation.)

1. Won't read anything else

2. Sometimes.

3. Are you crazy? I wouldn't be caught dead reading that trash

It seems the majority of those polled read romance. Not really a surprise, considering the most recent Romance Writers of America stats show that 26.4% of all books sold in the US are romance, and it generated a revenue of $1.37 billion. So someone's reading all those romance novels.

What troubled me about that poll, however, was MSNBC's use of the term "bodice-ripper" to describe the genre. Um... hello? How dated is that term? Did MSNBC bother to actually research their poll, or did they think romance novels are still referred to by that almost-offensive term?

It dates back to at least the 1970s - and generally referred to either the clinch covers (some of the cheesiest covers ever, raised to an art form), where the heroine was spilling out of her dress and the hero was also half-naked. Or, from the plot, in which it was quite common for the hero to use force in order to coerce the heroine into bed. One of the most famous historical romances (and one of my personal favorites) is Kathleen Woodiwiss's The Flame and the Flower - and in it, the hero actually rapes the heroine. But it all ends well. Still, that is no longer considered an acceptable plot device, as rape is really about violence and domination - not romance at all. But, since the heroes were beastly and generally tore clothes off the heroines, the term "Bodice-ripper" was born.

And it died out quite some time ago - but MSNBC seems to have (sadly) not bothered with their research, or else they would have known it.

I also read on another blog, that there are actual covers sold, to slip over your romance novel so no one will be able to tell that you are (insert gasp here) reading a romance novel.

WTF???

For the longest time, I was very sheepish about the fact that I wrote romance novels. I can't tell you how many times I've heard, "Oh, you write that trash? I never read it."

Okay, how do you know it's trash then? If you admit to how, then obviously you HAVE read it and I gotcha!

Or my favorite - "Oh, you write chick porn!"

Um. No. Porn has no real plot. It doesn't have to have a HEA (at least, not in the sense of one man and one woman riding off into the sunset. Happy ending has a totally different meaning in the world of porn).

My stories have conflict, and plot. They aren't just a bunch of sex scenes strung together and punctuated with awful dialogue. I try to create real, flawed people that readers want to root for and see end up together. Yes, my love scenes tend to run to the fairly steamy, but it isn't about the actual sexual act. It's about two people learning to trust, or learning to share, or letting each one into the more guarded recesses of their psyches. Sex is the symbol, not the reason for the story.

These stereotypes certainly don't help legitimizing romance as a something beyond what bored and lonely housewives read for escape (don't even get me started on that one. That's another grrr post right there). Romance is as legitimate a genre as suspense, or horror - and yet it's still looked down upon.

I love reading romance and I love writing it. Give me an HEA any day. The genre's come a looong way since the days of "bodice-rippers" - and I just wish that some people could grasp that concept and treat romance just like any other genre. I don't act all sheepish now when someone asks me what I do for a living. I tell them, I write romance.

And I'm pretty proud of that. =)

When It Just Won't Cooperate

When it comes to aggravating, a book that just won't behave really ranks up there. It's driving me crazy - not only because of the amount of work I've already put into it, but because I really like the story.

Unfortunately, there's just something... off... about it. I can't put my finger on it, but something just isn't working. I don't know if it requires too much suspension of disbelief, or the characters are wrong for each other, or what. I do know that it's just. Not. Working.

So maybe it's time to shelve it for a while. Not the happiest of thoughts, really. Sure, I have my trunk novels - the books that are just soooo bad that the bottom of a trunk is the only good place for them - but I don't know if this particular story is a trunkster. I like it. I like the characters. I like the plotline. So where did it go wrong?

Got me. I've read and reread it a few times, revised this, took that out, but still... It isn't improving. At least, I don't think it is. And it's driving me mad. There's almost nothing worse than spending months researching and writing, only to have something go sour. If it's something I can fix, great. But how do you fix something you can't find? And worse, how do I know it won't happen in another manuscript?

I guess that's what makes writing such a blessing and a curse. I love to write, love to create these worlds and the people who populate them. But at the same time, when it all goes to hell, it's frustrating as anything.

So, into the proverbial trunk it will go. Time to let it rest and try a different story. So, we'll see what happens then.

Keep your fingers crossed.

RWA Membership - Is it worth keeping?

I read an interesting blog post by Regina Carlysle on this subject and it got me to thinking about my own RWA membership, which will come up for renewal in September.

I joined RWA in 2000. I decided I'd had enough of "Dear Author" rejection letters and thought that, by joining the romance organization, I'd learn enough to become a real, live writer. So, I joined. Okay, I was on my way.

Or was I?

Now, I'll admit, I love the RWR - which is their trade magazine. I devour it every month because there are a lot of good articles about a variety of subjects within the romance writing world. And all I wanted was to see my name in their First Sales column. And with that, I'd gain entrance into The Club. PAN - their published-authors segment of RWA. Silly, maybe, but it seemed to me that would be validation. That would make me a writer.

To be honest, aside from that RWR, I don't get a whole lot out of RWA. I have never been to National. I don't order the conference CDs. Nothing. With the exception of New Jersey Romance Writers - my local RWA chapter. Now this is a group that is totally worth the dues every year. In a short time after joining them, I sold my first book. See? I was on my way.

Or was I?

Not by RWA standards. My publisher - an epublisher - was not on the coveted list of "Approved Publishers." Rats. I wasn't quite there just yet. Maybe someday.

That first sale did gain me entry into NJRW's PAN - which was good - but it wasn't RWA.

Then Ellora's Cave became the first epub to achieve the standards set by RWA in order to qualify as an "approved" publisher. Then Triskelion Publishing and Samhain, and Loose-ID - one by one, these epubs made it. They were "legitimate." (Not that not being recognized by RWA takes away from legitimacy, but within the industry at the time, it seemed the RWA approval carried a lot of weight.)

When Samhain closed to submissions in the spring of 2007, I was gritting my teeth because I'd been thisclose to being ready to submit to them. But then, RWA National came and it seemed like they were going to prove what a lot of us epublished authors already kind of thought.

RWA did away with their "Approved Publisher" criteria and revamped their recognition system.

They can claim their reasons all they want, but to me (and a lot of us) it seemed as if they changed those standards in order to pull that PAN status from the e-publishers. This organization claims to to operate in the best interest of their members - but to me, it seems that it's the best interest of select members. Print authors only. E-pubbed authors need not apply. Gotta keep out the riffraff.

I nearly let my membership lapse because of that. Why should I want to belong to a group that clearly views me as a second-class citizen? I joined EPIC - but don't know if that serves any purpose at all - but that's another blog post. And that is a growing feeling amongst e-published authors. We aren't "good enough" to hang with the print (PAN) members.

Now, my membership is coming up for renewal again, and I'm again wondering if I should bother. Well, actually, I already know the answer. I have no choice. If I wish to remain a member of NJRW, I must renew my RWA membership. Without it, I will not be allowed to remain and NJRW member. And that's why RWA can do nonsense stuff like change the rules to disqualify a certain segment of it's membership. Because they know members like me can't go anywhere because of their rules regarding chapter laws.

The ironic thing to me is that, last August, I sold a book to Samhain (woo hoo!). If I'd made that sale six weeks earlier, I'd be in The Club. Apparently six weeks earlier, I was good enough.

Well, I managed to sell four books without help from RWA. With any luck, I'll continue to sell books as well - keep your fingers crossed on that one! =) But I can't help but wonder what RWA will do when e-published authors reach their new standards? Raise them again? Outright refuse to acknowledge that e-pubbed authors are just as skilled and just as talented and work just as hard as print-pubbed authors? I wonder what sort of backlash that would create? It seemed as though it would happen last summer, but then it kind of died down. But as e-pubbed authors get closer and closer to meeting RWA PAN criteria, it should be interesting to see what happens.

Until then, I'll grit my teeth as I write that check every September. It's a mighty expensive magazine subscription.