Why is it...?

My WIP is driving me nuts. I have a self-imposed deadline of June 1st (the finished book has to be turned in to my editor by July 15th) and I think the story derailed, so I'm taking a few days to mull it over. And since I don't feel like kvetching about it, I'll kvetch about something else - like coupons that are for everything in the world except for that one item you really want.

That when I have a really good coupon (like, of, 20% off), the item I covet is listed in the fine print as excluded?

WTF is that? Drives me nuts.

I mean, I know why they do it - (and you know which store I'm talking about, don't you? They sell stuff for the Bedroom, the Bathroom, and beyond that...Oh, and if you need something Stapled - they do it, too) but I don't think it's really right. Instead of listing that endless paragraph of exclusions, they'd be better off saying something like: This coupon only good for a 10,000 count package of store brand used Q-Tips. (ew.) Because really, that's pretty much all it covers.(Or, if you're in need of Stapling, the fine print should read Good only for 10,000 ct box of broken rubber bands.)

I need a new toner for my printer. It's an HP laserjet. The toners are crazy expensive (and I'm relatively cheap, so you can imagine how many times I take that stupid cartridge out and shake the bejeezus out of it to eke out a just a few more pages' worth of toner,) Now, granted, I only replace it maybe twice a year, but still... So when I get a coupon for a specific office supply place, I'm happy when I find those coupons in the newspaper, or if they come in my email (gotta love those store cards. I've yet to be able to use any of the coupons they've emailed me. I'm pretty well set for neon pink pens, really.) My toner is ALWAYS excluded. HP toners are apparently as rare and special as deep-blue Tanzanite. And they must NEVER be discounted. Ever. The store, or maybe HP, would shrivel up and die if that happened, apparently.

We also need to think about replacing our vacuum. I've been coveting a Dyson since forever. But remember, I am cheap (and not rich, either, I might add) so $500 for a vacuum is going to leave a mark. And if you look in that coupon fine print, guess which ones are excluded? Of course. So guess who's probably not getting a Dyson. And guess who haz a sad over it. :(

A Few Things That Annoy Me

I'm finally starting to feel a little better (thank dog), and I'm at that stage now where I'm not sick enough to stay in bed and veg out to Rachael Ray, but not feeling quite well enough to hit the gym today. And that means that I am a little on the cranky side. Well, what better way to assuage the crankies than to rant about some stuff?

Actually, the topic popped into my head while I was perusing my Facebook wall. The more I think about it, the more I think I need to get away from Facebook--at least until the election is over. That one uber-political friend, the crazy ultra-right winger who probably has a stockpile of food and weapons in her basement, is just driving me beyond insane. I know it isn't directed at me, but at the same time, it kind of is because in her view, if you don't agree with her, you could not BE MORE WRONG and are worthy of only contempt.

So, in honor of the Facebook Friend Who Pisses You Off, I give you (in no particular order) a list of things that annoy me.

1. People who don't clean off the machines at the gym - You know these gross people. They've just spent forty minutes on the treadmill, you see the sweat dripping off them and yet, when they finish using the bench press, they don't clean it off. Seriously, WTF is wrong with these people? My gym is literally littered with spray bottles and rags -- all there for the express purpose of cleaning your grossness off the machines so no one else has to sit in your funk. Ew.

2. People who use the self-checkout lanes for their entire 2-weeks-worth-of-groceries shop - Now, I don't mean the people who use the scanner so that all they have to do is beep the End of Order bar and tally up (this is truly the only way to shop.) I mean the twit who has the entire cart filled to the point of overflowing, and is scanning. Each. Item. Individually. To me, those lanes are for small orders and the Scan-It orders. The fast orders.

3. The traffic light at the intersection of Dukes Parkway and Roycebrook Road - this signal is evil. I swear, every time I approach it, it changes to red (even when there is no cross traffic.) Then, just as I slow to a crawl, it turns green. It stays red long enough to slow me down and then BAM! Light changes. I swear it's mocking me. I don't know why, but that light's got it in for me.

4. People who comment on their own Facebook status - Not the ones who respond to the comments left by others. That's only polite. I mean the people who update their status, and are the only ones commenting on it. Do they realize they are, in essence, talking to themselves? And for the most part, it really isn't necessary to reiterate what you've just said. I get it. You hate Obama and you really want people to know it. Then you want them to know it again. And again. And again. Trust me, we get it. We just. Don't. Care. There isn't a single person on your friends' list who doesn't get it. Oh, and we all pretty much think you're nuts. It's very passive-aggressive, I realize, but I'm not about to start up a fight on Facebook over something as stupid as politics. I'll just gripe about it over here and on Twitter.

5. Spam - I don't know if it would annoy me quite as much if the stupid spammers at least got my gender right. WTF am I going to do with Viagra, Cialis, or any other penis-related drugs? I don't have a penis, you idiots. Spam me with offers for stuff like Jimmy Choos and I might (just maybe) bite. Trust me, I will never take you up on your ED meds offers. Oh, and I don't care how many lotteries I've won, I'm not sending you my bank account information.

And last, but not least

6. Blogger - Since when does Ctrl+I not italicize? I have to click on the little i up top, and then click on it 50 more times to unitalicize. WTF is that about? Grrr...

Okay. End of rant. As you were. :D

Rain, rain.... GO AWAY!

**sigh**


It's done nothing but rain in my little corner of the world.

Rain.

Rain.

Oh, look! Rain.

**rant alert** 

Seriously - we have not had a truly sunny day since May 12th. My backyard has inches of water standing on top of the grass. For some insane reason, our landscapers decided to try and mow the lawn. After 7 straight days of rain. WTF? Are they trying to ruin my yard??? Both my front and backyard now have stripes. I can't believe I actually have to tell the (supposed) professionals that, from now on, I do not want them anywhere near my lawn if it's rained in the last 48 hours (or nonstop for the last week.)

Of course, my plants are growing like crazy (except for my pot o'basil, which is pretty waterlogged. For some reason, the pot has no drainage. I'm hoping I can salvage some of the basil, but right now it's looking as if I'll have to plant fresh. Rats.) And the little sapling the Boy brought home from school on Earth Day? It's put out a separate branch and a bunch of leaves. Now, that may not sound like much, but this is the third sapling I've tried to grow. The first one was a little white pine that was doing very well until my landscapers (the same ones who didn't see anything wrong with trying to mow over-saturated grass) apparently can't tell the difference between a tree and a weed and cut it down. I coaxed it back to life, and on their next visit, the landscapers hacked it down again. It gave up after that.

As for the second sapling? The Boy's teacher forgot to put them in the kids' backpacks. She also forgot to keep the roots wet. I tried, but after about six weeks of it remaining a stick, I pulled it back out of the ground. Oh well.

But this one is doing well (I've got it staked so no one mistakes it for a weed.) My mint is growing like crazy. The parsley and sage are doing well. The rosemary is finally taking the hint an starting to poke up through the soil. My vincas are doing well, but the heavy rain (occasionally accompanied by end-of-the-world type winds) have decapitated the blooms. Fortunately, it looks like they're putting out new flowers, so all is not lost. And the entire woods behind my house is a stunning array of very vivid greens.

**end rant**

Now, in the spirit of trying desperately to remain glass-half-full, the sore muscle that's kept me from running (and walking like a normal person) for the last ten days? It's finally starting to feel better. I've missed running (I started in March, could barely do a quarter of a mile. Before I got hurt, I was up to two miles. Yay!), so I'm looking forward to getting back. For now, I do the same two miles on the elliptical machine, so hopefully I won't lose my endurance. I'm down almost 15 pounds (yay!) with ten more to go. I've actually had to go and buy new jeans because the old ones don't fit any more (yay!)

A Perfect Lady is chugging along. I'm still ticked with the characters, but payback is here and it's going to be fun to torture the daylights out of them . And I'll be here for Six-Sentence Sunday with another six from Rebecca and James. Want to know if she found her chemise? Want to know if she's caught with him and ruined forever? Well, tune in this Sunday...

I Must've Angered the Technology Gods...

Because they have all turned on me. Big time.

Let's see - I can receive email (as long as I don't send it from my gmail account to my personal account), but I can't send any. Great.

I tried to moderate a comment. The first three times, Blogger kept telling me that it was published, but the comment still showed up in the 'awaiting moderation' queue.' I logged out. I logged back in. Tried to approve the comment. Took three more shots, then was approved.

Or so I thought.

I went to check. Annnnd it wasn't there.

I'm shocked. Really.

So, I apologize to Abby. I didn't reject your comment - Blogger did. Stupid Blogger.

And this is why I do not like technology.

It's also why I'm not very fond of Verizon at the moment, either.

And it seems the feeling is mutual.

It's Monday, isn't it? Hopefully, I'll have something much cheerier (which is what I was going to post tonight) to post tomorrow or Wednesday.

Who knows? Maybe Verizon will have pulled their head out of a lower orifice and fixed. my. email.

Nimrods.

That is all.


ETA - Abby's comment is there. Blogger just refuses to acknowledge it. Stupid. Blogger.

Is It Spring Yet?

Because I am really sick of the cold.

Normally, I'm a huge fan of the cool weather - spring and fall are my favorite seasons, and I despise NJ summers. I swear my people must have come from Ireland in the cold months because there is no way they stepped off the boat in the middle of July, looked around, and said, "YES! This is the place!" Not. Possible.

But for some reason, this winter seems endless. Maybe because it got very cold very fast, and has pretty much stayed that way (though, on Monday, the temp was in the fifties, so it was like a mini-heatwave!), but I am sooooo ready for the cold weather to be over with, and there's still what? eight weeks left?

Ugh.

So, as I sit here in my office, looking out at the nekkid tree branches, and seeing the snow (finally) melted away, all I can think about is opening the windows and feeling warm air. I'm sick of cold, sick of ice, sick of my hair being all static-y, and sick of having to wear gloves and earwarmers when I walk the dog.

So, is it spring yet?

Mea Culpa

It's been waaay too long since my last post and I'm sorry - life, in its infinite wonderfulness, threw a huge curveball at me back around Wednesday and I'm still playing catch up.

First, both the Boy and the Girl were not only sick, but both came down with pinkeye as well. Oh. Joy. Eye drops all around.

Then, I got hit with either a wicked cold or a mild case of the flu - I was running a fever Thursday, and as of today, I sound very much like Fran Drescher, according to the Girl.

And to top everything off, my laptop up and died on me last night. Keep your fingers crossed I can retrieve the pictures and a lot of the internet bookmarks I've collected over the years (so many research sites... I may have a nervous breakdown if I can't get those back.) So now, I have a new laptop, which my husband and I knew we were going to have to buy, we just didn't really want to do it now.

So, until everything evens out again (and considering Christmas is only what? Ten days away) chances are very good that I will not be posting regularly just yet. I'll try, but there is just so much other stuff going on...

Anyway, wish me luck with retrieving that info. Fortunately, I have copies of most of the pictures, but since I can't swear to it, I'll sleep much better if I can get the ones on the old laptop. And those bookmarks... ugh...

On the brighter side, revisions to both Tiger Eyes and Devil in Disguise are finished. Tiger Eyes will be ready to go shortly after the new year. Devil will take a bit longer, but I'm hoping to have it out by early spring.

Hoping...

hoping...

The Giants

Suck.

That's all.

I can only hope they decide to show up and play next week.

Lord knows they didn't feel much like playing today.

Oy.

They.

Suck.

Can You Tell it's Monday?

Poor Monday - the one day almost universally disliked. And this one's no exception.

First, I'm up at the crack of dawn (which sucks on the best of days, really, never mind on a Monday morning) and I wake my husband, who promptly growls at me to leave him alone. Apparently, he's caught the cold the kids have had (and mind you, it is only a cold), and that means the entire world is supposed to come to a screeching halt for him (the baby.)

I shower and dress and then I have to almost literally drag the Girl out of bed. She whines like a 2 year old about being tired, cold, cranky... you name it - she's whining about it this morning.

I get her into the shower and go downstairs to fix coffee (I cannot function without my morning joe. Not one little bit), put the heat on (I'll concede that to the Girl - it was cold in the house this morning. First time I've run the heat this year...) and figure I'll take the dog for a walk before the Girl comes out of the shower and wants breakfast.

I go past the coffeepot (coffee!!) and do a double-take. There's only about a cup in the pot, which has been brewing about 15 minutes by now. It should be done. This is not good.

So I pour it into my cup, stick the pot back under the filter-thingie and give it a little nudge to remind it that it's supposed to be filling the pot.

The dog's in the kitchen doorway, her entire body wagging because ohboyohboyohboy, we're goin' for a walk! ohboyohboyohboy, we're goin' for a walk! ohboyohboyohboy, we're goin' for a walk! ohboyohboyohboy, we're goin' for a walk! 

ohboyohboyoh--

Nope. Sorry, pup. Not yet.

No more coffee is filling the pot.

Oh

Hell

So I doctor my coffee and take a sip to steel myself for the fact that I've probably got water all over my counter from the coffeemaker leaking or some other such nonsense that is happening far too early in the morning for my liking.

A sip---

oh

my

god

I poured the coffee out and I swear, it retained the shape of the mug. I'm surprised it didn't dissolve the spoon - that's how strong it was.

And still no more in the pot.

Now the dog is practically dancing in the kitchen doorway -

gottapee. gottapee. gottapee. gottapee.

So I take the filter basket out. Take the filter (it's one of those gold filters) and wash the basket in case something's clogging it. Put it all back together, and hope for the best.

silence

No.

Coffee.

damn

By now, the Girl's downstairs, head all wrapped in a towel so she doesn't drip all over the place. She's having a pop tart and reading a cereal box and just takin' it easy, even though she's only got about 10 minutes to dry her hair, brush it out, get her shoes on, and get the bus.

In a desperate bid for coffee (please, God, I need my coffee!!!!) I empty the coffeemaker, reset everything and try again. It splutters a little (yes, this is good, actually. It's the sound it makes right before it fills. yay!) and I make the Girl's lunch.

That's done and it's too late to take the dog for a walk before the bus. I'll take her to the bus stop with me and we'll walk from there.

By now, the dog's got her legs crossed and she's looking a little desperate.

gottapeegottapeegottapeegottapee

like, NOW!

But now I've noticed the spluttering has stopped.

I look.

Damn it.

"damn it!"

Dog goes running off. Won't come near me now to let me put her harness on her. She's a weenie like that - one yell, and she thinks she's going to get it. I forgot how skittish she is with the raised voices (she's a rescue dog and we don't know anything about her life before she ended up with the rescue people.) and now, she won't come near me at all.

argh.

Okay. Now it's 8AM and the Girl's bus is due any moment. We leave the house (sans dog, who is hiding under the dining table with her legs crossed) and the Girl shivers and says, "It's COLD!"

She's not wearing a jacket.

**headslap**

I get her jacket and bring it out and we make it to the bus stop with moments to spare before the bus (which arrives at a different time every morning - just to keep it interesting, I guess) arrives.

Get her on the bus. Go back to finally walk the dog.

Dog still won't come near me.

Grrr...

Anyway, my husband finally coaxes her out and into her harness, we go for a walk, I go and get coffee (God bless the inventor of the Dunkin' Donuts) and because it's been such a blech morning, some Munchkins are in order as well. All then becomes right in my world.

Later on today, I'll go out and replace the @$^%!@^ coffeemaker.

It's going to be a long week.